The Bad News is that I still have this “cold” and unfortunately it hasn't killed me.
The Good News is that I no longer care. In fact I'm learning to enjoy the low frequency buzz that radiates from my sinus cavities into my ears. I suspect and accept that I will most likely host this parasite for the rest of my life.
The BETTER News.... I have a voice that is so sexy I now have a new panacea for screwing with telemarketers.
That's right, boys and girls, “always look on the bright side of life”
I am nearing the third month of this “cold” which means it's no longer an illness, it is a way of life. I have learned much, some of it worth sharing.
First, it would never in my entire life occur to me to call the doctor because I have a cold. If you are an otherwise healthy adult, and you can watch international news for fifteen minutes and still believe that your cold/flu symptoms warrant medical intervention, then I can only hope for you a big slap up the backside of the head.
Ask me how many otherwise healthy adult patients are on their third different round of antibiotic and still struggling with the same symptoms. If they're a woman, they have now added a yeast infection to the mix. Now they can be miserable at both ends of the torso.
Forget antibiotics. Even if they affected viruses—WHICH THEY DON'T!! I refused them from the start and always do. You will get antibiotics into me when I am unconscious and they must be delivered intravenously. Any infection less than that and I will rely on my body's own defense system. If more people did that we wouldn't have super germs. Ok, ok, don't there.
I'll admit to consuming pseudophedrine Hcl on a consistent basis, just short of arousing suspicion that I'm running a meth lab. At home I've been using the Neti pot twice daily which immediately reverts the green mucous back to clear. I'm daily dosing on Vitamin C with Zinc, then doubling the L-Lysine to prevent the cold sores that the excess Vitamin C causes. Daily doses of Pu-Erh tea and antibiotic-FREE chicken soup at every opportunity. Increase fluids, decrease simple carbohydrates. During the worst of it, a healthy shot of NyQuil before bed with a toast to Lewis Black.
Please note: I am NOT prescribing. I am merely sharing a personal experience.
This is the first time in years I've contracted a respiratory/sinus infection. My record has been broken NOT because I have been lax with hygiene and preventative measures. There is no prevention for patients unexpectedly coughing in your face while you're drawing blood, getting a blood pressure, dressing a wound, starting an IV or giving an injection. Just because their breeding source never taught them to cover their cough and in the fourteen hours of television they watch daily, the commercials that may educate them on tissues, colds, germs and hand washing are the ones that air while they're at the fridge or toilet.
As a testament to my basic prevention skills, Richard has not had so much as a sniffle, and he's been off anti-infectives for months now. It's hard to explain how scary it is to be sick when you live with someone fighting cancer. On the “UP” side, you're so focused on keeping them safe from you that you're distracted from your own misery. FYI, this was one of the main reasons his doctors wanted me to get a four week extension on my FMLA—because he was so fragile, his immune system was non-existent and I worked in a doctor's office. Oh. I'm sorry. Did I just offend someone?
If I'm about to touch Rich or anything that he will touch, I wash my hands while saying three Hail Marys so I know I've got a full 30 seconds of washing. (Yes, I have timed this. Not only do I cover the necessary time for hand washing, I'm also praying, and I'm a firm believer in multi-tasking) I cover my cough with my elbow, not my hands. I sleep facing away from him, and with my CPAP on I can't breath on him anyway. I keep the temperature below 68 degrees, 65 in the bedroom. There's a reason operating rooms are so cold.
But the worst part of embracing my new Life Partner Parasite is maintaining my professional caring and compassion with the thirty phone calls a day from the otherwise healthy patients who “woke up this morning with a scratchy throat and I've sneezed three times. I want the doctor to call in an antibiotic for me.”
If ever there was a situation that inspires in me a desperation to call a Come to Jesus meeting....
Double Tip of the Day If it's winter in Ohio...good chance of snow; if it's cold and flu season....Hand hygiene and common courtesy are the best prevention.
